Monday, November 30, 2009

Does anyone have a screwdriver?

Believe this: I can be a tad shy sometimes.

And I've been working on my courage for three days, trying to screw up enough to call a boy.

This isn't the first time. I've joined in the past and never gotten the reaction I wanted.

But now I have a foundation of serenity. I feel like I've discovered a peacefulness in my heart that will allow me to open myself up to the possibility of falling in love.

I feel like I'm able to put up boundaries that will disallow toxic people from entering or affecting me.

I feel stronger, more confident.

Except for making this phone call.

All the opinions are in: he sounds great and he's dead sexy.

So what's stopping me?

What if Hockey Jersey really likes me? What if Hockey Jersey really wants to get to know me better? What if Hockey Jersey really wants to meet me?

There's a whole world of possibility lying before me.

And, for the first time in a very long while, it feels like it's ALL within reach.

The question is, do I have enough courage within me to just do it?

To reach out and let someone in?

Screw it. I'm going to the gym.

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